Since the middle of my stint on Abilify my immune system has significantly weakened. I’ve been off of the Abilify for almost two years and I’m still seeing the effects it had on my immune system. I am sick on almost a regular basis, and have been for some time. The rate has gone down slowly, but I am still getting sick about every 5-6 weeks on average. Mostly sinus and ear infections, and upper respiratory type stuff. In the event that I am exposed to something viral then I am almost guaranteed to get it. I swear someone could sneeze on the other end of the parking lot and I could catch a cold.
All of this brings us to my last few days. My good streak has ended. I went in after fighting going to the doctor for almost week, and sure enough I have a double ear infection. Cool, right? I mean I guess having a good center of balance is useful and all so I needed to go, but COME ON.
I was put on Zythromax (aka the Z-pack). I haven’t been on that for some time because my body had become immune (HA!) to its effects.
The past 3 days I have been incredibly angry. Everything sets me off, I can’t let anything go, and I have been grossly overreacting. I’ve had a steadily rising level of rage inside me with each day since I started the Z-pack. I’m losing control of my emotions. I can’t keep myself in check. Along with this anger I have been experiencing almost debilitating anxiety. Every though brings me to the edge of panic. I am taking negative thoughts and turning them into fears and obsessions.
At first I thought maybe I was always wrong in thinking that the Z-pack is an antibiotic. Steroids can wreak havoc on bipolar people. But, a quick Google search dismissed my theory. So I called the pharmacist. She informed me that rage, anger, and aggression can all be side effects of the Z-pack. Then she went on to say that those side effects become more frequent in females, and people on psychiatric medications/with psychological disorders. Oooooh goody.
So I decided, because of the escalation factor, to avoid the rest of the dosages.
I tell myself I am not allowed to feel sorry for myself. However, this is one of those times that I get to let out the “WHYYY MEEE?!” battle cry. My plan of action is to sit down with my psych doctor and go through what I can and can’t take, my experience with meds, and come up with some lists that I can refer to. Hopefully he will be able to offer suggestions as to what to try. With my immune system in its current state, I can’t afford to not be able to take anything.
I am unbelievably sensitive to medication and dosages, I have a few very inconvenient drug allergies, and an affinity to bad reactions. So, yes, “WHY ME?! WHY NOT JUST ONE THING, NOT ALL OF THEM?”